Sometimes it Hurts
by HermioneGirl96
Summary: Harry knew he had to break up with Ginny. He was going to be on the run, finding Horcruxes, fighting evil, and possibly dying in the process. He couldn't mix her up in that. But, Merlin, he wanted to stay with her. A one-shot.


**Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter. **

**A/N: It's from Harry's perspective and it's about breaking up with Ginny. It takes a while to figure out who's talking and what he's talking about, so I figured I should tell you.**

It had to be done. I'd talked to Hermione after making my decision not to return to Hogwarts, and she'd agreed. It simply had to be done.

I didn't want to do it. I really didn't want to do it.

I didn't do it that week, or the next. Gin was in the middle of her O.W.L.s. Even though I was going to hurt her, I didn't have to do it then, and I wouldn't.

But now it was time; the O.W.L.s were over, the funeral was over, and everyone was packing. I had to do it, and it had to be soon.

I _really_ didn't want to do it.

I sought out Ginny. She was by the lake playing Exploding Snap with Luna. Her long, red hair caught and reflected the sunlight as it fell across her shoulders and brushed the ground while she lounged there by the lake, lying on her stomach, propped up on her elbows and laughing. She was beautiful. Perfect. And I loved her.

That was why I had to break up with her.

Sure, it would hurt her. It would hurt both of us. But I was about to drop out of school to risk my life hunting Horcruxes. I would probably get killed in the process. Even if I didn't, I wouldn't be able to see her, and I'd be in danger a lot. I had to end it. She couldn't be dating the Number One Most Wanted Wizard in the world. I loved her, and I knew I couldn't put her through that.

But Merlin, I didn't want to break up with her.

I stood by the lake just watching Ginny until she and Luna finished their game of Exploding Snap. Then there was no more delaying it. I made my way over to the two of them. "Gin?" I said, as gently as I could.

"Yeah?" she asked, and I could hear in her voice that she knew what was coming.

"Walk with me?" I suggested, and it was perhaps the first time that I'd ever been near tears in public. Merlin, this was going to be hard.

"Sure. See you around, Luna," Ginny answered, standing. Her hand was instantly in mine. It was such a small gesture, but I loved it. No matter what she did, it felt good. She was perfect. I really didn't want to leave her.

Luna stood and made her way back to the castle while Ginny and I started off on a slow walk around the lake. We'd come this way before, a few times, but this felt different. Now we weren't trying to squeeze every last drop of happiness out of what time we had together. We were both in the process of accepting that such time didn't exist anymore.

"Gin, I'm not coming back to Hogwarts next year," I said finally.

"I figured you wouldn't," she replied.

"And there's a good chance I'll die," I continued. "I'll be in a lot of danger. There's this . . . job Dumbledore left for me to do, and I have to do it. It's part of beating Voldemort. Hopefully I'll make it, but there's no guarantee. And . . . I think you'd just get hurt if you stayed with me."

"I'm not afraid of that, Harry."

"Gin, you're the bravest girl I know. You came with me that night at the Ministry, and you fought. You've been possessed by Voldemort. You've seen your dad nearly killed by Voldemort's snake, and you've watched one of your brothers turn traitor, and you've never cracked. You're amazing. But you don't need to be tied up in what I have to do. Please, Gin. It's just going to get you hurt."

"So you can handle it, but I can't?" she challenged. Merlin, did she have to make it this hard?

"It's not like that, Gin. You know it's not. I don't want to break up with you. I swear I don't. I wish I weren't the Boy Who Lived. I wish I were just a normal Hogwarts student and Voldemort didn't exist and there was nothing to fight and I could stay here with you and finish out my education and not worry about anything bigger than my N.E.W.T. results. I wish I could be with you forever and promise you that I would live to be an old man and we could be a normal, happy couple together. And maybe someday it'll happen. But that's not now, Gin. Right now I have to go fight and risk my life and maybe die, because, if I don't, Voldemort's going to take over. I'm the only one who can do what I have to do. Please, Ginny, let me go. I swear, if we win and Voldemort dies, I'll be with you forever. But I won't tie you to my fate. Not when the chances look this bleak."

"Ron and Hermione are coming."

"That's different! You know that's different! They're . . ." I floundered helplessly for words. What was so special about Ron and Hermione? What made them so different from Ginny that they could come with me on my crazy mission and Ginny couldn't? I had no answer. "Ginny, please. I don't want to break up with you, but I have to. Please don't make this harder for me than it already is."

She was quiet for a while. At last, she said, "All right. I just . . . I really don't want to lose you."

"I know. I don't want to lose you either."

There was nothing left to say, and I went back to Gryffindor tower while Ginny kept making her way around the lake. When I got to the common room, Hermione asked, "Well?"

"I did it," I told her hoarsely. I didn't want to talk about it.

"Oh, Harry." She hugged me hard. I had to admit, she was a really good friend. She was like a sister to me—I would never date her—but she was amazing in her own way.

"Thanks, Hermione," I managed. I turned to go up to my dormitory. I really didn't want to talk anymore.

"Harry?" she asked as I was leaving.

"Yeah?" I replied wearily.

"You'll get her back."

"You think so?" I didn't dare hope. I knew Ginny and I had a good relationship, but I'd just broken up with her, and she was about to spend a year at Hogwarts without me. I didn't doubt her faithfulness, but, after all, we weren't together anymore. Even if I didn't die, I didn't feel sure I could be with her again.

"You will," Hermione asserted. She sounded so sure that I just had to believe her. After all, she was almost never wrong.

"Thanks."

**A/N: Reviews and favorites are lovely!**


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